“Our form room is facing the stage in the hall, and is commonly known as Room 26. Amidst smashed windows, broken desks, old sandwiches and Andrew, thirty miserable humans slouch around, plagued by last night's English homework. Heather Bowden and S. Holt whilst an adult male known as Mr Brackstone bounces merrily in, as he does every morning, only to be greeted by us… Amidst pens, ink, sawdust and old teachers' bones, certain people are members of organisations… We were presented with a shield (which brought us £2.57 at the junk-shop) and a stone replica of a 4x4 brick.”
“The Black Jack Gang sit round the poker table drinking straight lemonades… Certain days at noon, some of our guys and gals attend sports to keep them fit for the raids on the local bank.”
"Once again, pen poised, I rack my brains to think of something to write. Thirty-one slavering fifth formers perform wild tricks and exercise their tonsils in the hope of getting their names printed in heavy black type. Well hard luck, because I have already decided that the hardworking representative people of 5S shall be mentioned (and believe me, folks, that isn't many - in fact, I don't think there's anyone!)