Well, where to start? Mr Vincent is an RS teacher who sometimes teaches history to Year 7s for some reason. His room is Room 25. Vinnie also has a twin brother who owns a church (or something). He once ran over a cat and blamed it on his neighbor.
In his youth, many probably wouldn't have recognised Mr Vincent. Allegedly having hair in his twenties, in fact, quite a lot of it - having both long hair and a fringe. He was (and perhaps still is) a fan of The Cure, his favourite song being A Letter To Elise. He has also admitted to being a more dedicated fan than most and having experimented with both lipstick and blue eyeshadow! Unfortunately, this fashion statement hasn't stuck with him.
On the last day of each year he wears his white/cream suit along with a tan tie that says 'Vinnie' in red letters, that a Sixth Form class got him many moons back. In his words "I'm never going to wear this tie again, it's ugly but my Sixth Formers got me it." at least the tie now sees daylight once a year rather than never.
He also has a number of other ties, one most famously sporting Bugs Bunny. The Craigster also has a Star Wars watch.
It is a miracle Mr Vincent hasn't been fired long ago. Each year we are surprised to return to BRGS with Mr Vincent still teaching.
Each class must have countless weird stories about Craig, including getting students to stroke his hands (because in his words, they were 'as soft as a baby's bottom') and beard (exactly - what beard??), and himself stroking students' hair in lesson for no particular reason. Whilst covering the topic of cults in Year 10 RS he told the class a list of all the students he would sleep with if he were in a cult.
Following his old wiki entry many people believed his 'table tennis club' was in fact a sex club, and this is usually the first thing Year 7s read on the old wiki and then share with the rest of their year group and from then on Mr Vincent's lessons seem like the funniest thing.
It is believed Vinny is possibly a hypnotist, and when approached by the authority figures of school he just swings a pocket watch at them saying 'I will not fire Mr Vincent. Mr Vincent is perfectly normal and a brilliant teacher.'
(To each new class of Year 7s) “I couldn't care less if you died.”
“All women think is ‘oh no, my dress will get muddy!’”
(Mr Vincent asking the Core RS Year 11 class why they hadn't done the lockdown work)
Student: Sir, we are stressed out enough about other subjects, do you not care about your students' mental health?
Mr Vincent: Looks awkward and stays silent
Student: Do you really not care about our mental wellbeing?
Mr Vincent: Well, a little bit…
“When I first came here to BRGS in 1927…”
“Why am I so small? I want to be big!”
Student: Sir, why do men and women pray separately in mosques?
Mr V: Because some men, such as myself, may not be able to resist the temptation to look up womens' skirts.
“I only call friends when I need something, like chainsaws.”
“Not to be sexist, but you know I love to be sexist whenever I can… but women have longer phone calls than men.”
(To a Year 7 student who didn't know the answer to a question) "It's alright. Don't worry. Just forget the rest of the class and imagine you and me, alone, sat having a candlelit dinner."
"Cover up your ears... I'm about to swear. You must promise me you won't tell any of the higher members of staff. (looks from side to side then proceeds to walk into a chair) Oh bum!"
"I'm married - to my wife - and if I were to have an affair with another member of staff the police wouldn't care. I mean, my wife would be upset but still."
"I'll just be spitting on your face soon."
"How long do you think I spent choosing my suit this morning? Less than 53 minutes. In fact, 0 minutes. How about my hair? Yes, it took me about 2 hours this morning to get it looking this good."
"Listen up all you speccy four eyes, you're infecting us all. I'm going to get the rest of the class to beat you all to death."
"Fear me. I've travelled from Bolton."
"Now, lets say I watch everything to do with the Kardashians, I don't miss a single episode. Just kidding... (nervous laughter) I don't even know who they are..."
“I'm just going to take my belt off and pretend to hang myself."
“With a box like that open its tempting to just.... (takes out brownie) take one.”
(Talking about those £1 wedding rings from Pound Land) “Maybe I just care more about love but I spent £50 for two rings"
"I have a taste for chairs.”